Regarding Those Orgy Reviews…

secret sex party, shutterstock, business insider

Photo from Business Insider/Shutterstock

OK, I know I’m super late on this, as I haven’t had much time to write here lately, but I wanted to discuss those Hacienda party reviews that appeared in a few online publications in Feb. You know the one that first ran in Business Insider and then got picked up by Slate and a bunch of other places, quoting a certain “Mr. Sparks” and talking about a sex party we all know and love and have been going to for years. A few of my friends asked me for my thoughts, and a sort-of rebuttal to it, so I’m finally getting around to it.

My first thought was: “Secret??”” Bwahahahahaha!

The word was featured prominently on all headlines regarding the story and I thought it was funny because there parties are hardly secret. There are hundreds, if not thousands, of people that get invited or have been invited over the years. And even if you don’t get invited, if you’re on the various alternative scenes in New York, you’ve likely heard of it through word-of-mouth and Facebook posting to the tune of “OMG, the Hacienda party was SOOO amazing last night!!” (yes, yes, I’ve been one of those posters). But, ya know, if you consider that secret, that’s up to you.

My second thought was: Who is Mr. Sparks? Continue reading

Viewer Discretion Advised

Bushwick Burlesque, Darlinda Just Darlinda, BUshwick, burlesque, Bizarre, sideshow

Scary Ben and Darlinda Just Darlinda at their Bushwick Burlesque show.

(A.K.A.: How my friends put on an anniversary Burlesque show in Brooklyn).

So I went to the two-year anniversary of the Bushwick Burlesque show (the one I was talking about in my Two Cents on Twerking post) at Bizarre last Tuesday and it fucking killed. I mean, they always kill. But somehow they manage to kill even more each time. It’s a variety show, granted, but I haven’t seen range quite like theirs at many other shows. Having gone there religiously for most of the past two years. I have seen some of the best burlesque, creepiest sideshow acts, ridiculous absurdity and gorgeous dirt there. Scary Ben, who in his expertly moustached clown get-up runs the show with New York burlesque queen (and his fiancée) Darlinda Just Darlinda, was once describing the spectacle to a friend as “exuberant filth.”

I completely agree. “I LOVE exuberant filth!” I squealed at the time (and then proceeded to add it as a fetish on FetLife. Hey guys, you should join me!) It’s that and then some. TimeOut New York billed the show as, “inspired alt-ecdysiast shenanigans.” The Village Voice has previously dubbed Darlinda Just Darlinda, who I’ve been watching perform (read: stalking) since 2006, as “the mastermind of bizarre extravaganza,” a title she proudly and rightfully wears.

And as if their own acts of absurdist revelry weren’t enough, the show usually brings together international burlesque stars, boylesque eye candy, sideshow performers, clowns, drag queens, blues singers, comedians, fire performers, sword swallowers and other stage delights that don’t even lend themselves to classification.  Continue reading

That Onion Date


(A review of a pretty awful date I had gone on with a hipster who was sporting a most fabulous handlebar mustache … As written to a few friends at the time).

We started out by having a drink at Harefield Road, a local bar in East Williamsburg. He told me he was a (self-proclaimed, presumably) filmmaker. Lived in Brooklyn all his life (formerly from Bensonhurst). Now lives in a loft with four other guys off the Morgan stop on the L train (right above it, actually, probably a bit noisy and rattle-y, I’d imagine).

After Harefield Road, we went to a random place on the corner of Bushwick and Devoe where a friend of his was having a party for her music video release. It was one of those random DIY spaces that was packed with hipsters. He said there was going to be free drinks and food, but instead there was a $10 cover charge (and for what?), the booze wasn’t free (or rather there was a “strongly suggested donation”) and the free food consisted of deviled eggs that were kind of meh…Also, the place stunk like hell. At first I didn’t know what it was and later I realized it was onions . . . everywhere. Continue reading