The Book of Laughter and Remembering

Metropolitan Museum, Sculpture Garden, NYC

The sculpture garden at The Metropolitan Museum, New York

(For Kay, who wanted me to post a review of my cry-fest locales in NYC, as they say you’re not a real New Yorker until you’ve cried in public here).

The other day, I walked by a coffee shop in my neighborhood, in which I had cried my eyes out some time ago before going to a day-time orgy. I had buried my face in his chest, trying to avoid eye contact with strangers, but of course they noticed, and either tried to look at what was happening out of the corner of their eyes or to avert their gazes uncomfortably. I didn’t say many words at the time, or at least not many coherent ones. I didn’t need to. He knew what had happened. Continue reading

Sex Statistics!

sex-market-researchSo I hear some of you have been waiting with bated breath for the results of my Sex Survey. I finally put my number crunchin’ and data analysis pants on the other day, and am happy to deliver some sexy statistics to you.

As a reminder, the idea behind running the survey came from a conversation I had with P, when we both counted our number of sex partners, compared that to the number of people we’d slept with from within the sex party/poly/fetish scene and realized it was a small percentage of the total. The conclusion? Sluts will be sluts whether they’re on such a scene or not. I then decided to poll some other folks on these scenes to see if the same was true for others. And, on average, it appears to be so! Continue reading

The Slut-o-Meter (a fun survey)

sex surveyWhen I was bored at home one night a few weeks ago, I decided to tally the number of sexual partners I’ve had. I’ve done this before, of course, but this time I did something different. I decided to ferret out how many of these partners were people from the poly, sex-positive, fetish or whatever-you-want-to-call-it scene(s). And I was surprised to find out that only about 1/4th of my total number* came from the related scenes.

I then shared these findings with my friend, P, who vaguely estimated her own numbers in her head and said that the same would be true of hers. Conclusion? We were both slutty long before getting on to any of these scenes. Then we decided to conduct a survey among other scene people to see if the same was true of their numbers. Continue reading

Generating Heat in Jan.

The lovely Miss Rashbaum of M Events chugging champagne at Splendorfuck II, as you do. (Photo by Chris VMP).

The lovely Miss Rashbaum of M Events chugging champagne at Splendorfuck II, as you do. (Photo by Chris VMP).

So I’m back in New York. It’s cold. Or it’s bound to get a lot colder this week, as polar vortex #2 (or something like it) is visiting again, I hear. But I’ve been so busy prancing around that I haven’t had time to even register the weather. Hopefully that method will continue to work this week. Some say that cold, heat and pain are just a state of mind.

As soon as I got back a week and change ago, I jumped straight into the swing of things. On January 10, I attended the decadent and debaucherous stylings of one of M Events’ parties, Splendorfuck II, where the theme was something like Marie Antoinette meets glam rock/David Bowie (meets my crazy friends who put it to good use). These are some of my favorite motifs (and people, whom I hadn’t seen in a while), so I had to go, naturally. And it was a splendidly good time, indeed. Here is some photographic evidence: Continue reading

Summer Daze

summer lounging

Leisurely lounging with a lovely friend on a lazy summer afternoon. Oh how I miss those warm summer rays, as well as the owner of that lovely behind, who gets to enjoy them all year round as she’s currently living in Florida. It’s why her ass is so much more tanned than mine is, as you can see. (Photo by the unparalleled Infinite Eye).

A small housekeeping note

Dear reader,

I wanted to let you know that I migrated my web site to a different hosting platform with the help of my dear lover, C, who also happens to be an expert web designer. All the same WordPress tools seem to still be here, so I don’t think anything’s been lost in translation, but I am still feeling my way around this new landscape, adding/subtracting some things and working on making the site even more awesome. Please stand by while we re-jigger things around here. And let me know if you notice anything that’s missing.

For one thing, it seems I can no longer see my followers, but y’all are still here, right? Anything else, let me know. And thank you, again, for your dedicated attention spans, which are often hard to come by in the modern world of endless distractions.



And the floodgates open’d…

(H waxing poetic in old English on the joys of getting laid):

and having tasted fruit of the loins of a woman, nay, not a dull shrew but a woman, a woman who drinketh with joy from the bodily cup and rejoiseth, having drunk the nectar from the cup, he found himself proclaiming and desirous of another such cup; for he was in exile, slavishly at labor, drinking wine with the old men in the marketplace; but now, having sipped from a different pitcher, and licked his lips obscenely, he grew yet more desirous to drink from more such cups, nay, not of the old men, but of the young and nubile and in possession of low hanging fruit, so that he may sate himself again, and i say, yet again; for he recalled the joys of the other gender, where the other gender seemed joyless and genderless, but he recalled things now, wilde things, forests wondrous and pubic, imperfect and pale, and all the more wondrous for it; and he found himself thirsting all the more.

Thank you for this, and every other piece of brilliance, my dear BFF! <3

Paulo Coelho on Sexual Deviance

While reading Bo Blaze‘s book, I was reminded of this passage I loved from Paulo Coelho‘s Veronika Decides to Die, which I read some time ago. So I thought I’d post it for you here, too. Hope he (Paulo, that is) won’t mind that I copied a whole two pages out of his material, I do love his work ever so much. Reading a sixth book of his (11 Minutes) now.

Here is the text:

“In his dissertation on Vitriol, he would have to include a long chapter on sex. After all, so many neuroses and psychoses had their origins in sex. He believed that fantasies were electrical impulses from the brain, which, if not realized, released their energy into other areas.

During his medical studies, Dr. Igor read an interesting treatise on sexual deviance, sadism, masochism, homosexuality, coprophagy, coprolalia, voyeurism—the list was endless.

At first, he considered these things examples of deviant behavior in a few maladjusted people incapable of having a healthy relationship with their partners. As he advanced his profession as psychiatrist, however, and talked to his patients, he realized that everyone has an unusual story to tell. His patients would sit down in the comfortable armchair in his office, stare hard at the floor, and begin a long dissertation on what they called “illness” (as if he were not the doctor) or perversions (as if he were not the psychiatrist charged with deciding what was and wasn’t perverse). Continue reading

Are you creative?

Of course you are! And so is your square suburban-dwelling boss, your hairdresser, your dentist, your cab driver, your mailman, etc.

“Creative” has become such an overused buzzword everywhere you turn. It seems everyone, these days, either is it, wants to be it, or thinks they’re it. Every business wants to tack the word on to its name somewhere. Everybody seems to want to be employed in a creative field or have “creative” be part of their title or department. There are Creative Technologies, creative caterers, as well as a meetup group for Creative Coders, the list goes on.

But is everyone good at being creative? Should everyone be? Don’t we also need a little bit more of the left-brained people? You know the engineers, scientists, mathematicians and such. And when did everyone start placing such a high value on creativity? Was this always the case or is it just the culture in New York or modern society or … something? Continue reading

The Crown Heights Underground (Literally)

Apparently the residents of Crown Heights can’t get high speed internet because the wiring in some of these old, poor neighborhoods is so antiquated and is all underground, that they’d have to restructure the whole network in order to fix this. Heard this from an inhabitant last night. He apparently has to use his phone to get high speed internet. Anyone know anything more about this?

(Also, yes, I know #firstworldproblems).